Lesson 1: What Qualities Make You Unique?
So, I took some time this week and paid attention to how I felt about myself when I was doing things that one typically does alone. Ahem… I figured out that while playing The Last of Us on PS3, I had patience and control in the face of great adversity – mostly those clickers.
Also, I found I was able to laugh at the darkest humor, and was pretty clever about avoiding tough situations (see above re: clickers).
I took a nap with the cats, and was happy to notice how snuggly, sensitive, and caring I am. After said nap, I went out and enjoyed a Pumpkin Spice Latte from Starbucks, and enjoyed the hell out of it.
So, what have we learned?
I’m a clever, caring, snuggly, patient and controlled person who can see the humor in the darkest situations, and be someone who enjoys the simple pleasures in life.
See?! How great is that? Now, it’s your turn. Comment below with what you came up with, and see you next week for Lesson 2!
Lesson 2: Start a Conversation with 3 Strangers.
Well, audience, I have to tell you, I only started conversations with two strangers, but I think I still get an E for Effort 🙂
I met a woman on my running path and through our converstion, I will now be volunteering with a voter-rights group. I also met a man on the run trail and in our conversation, he mentioned that he could tell I was losing weight – I was elated! I’ve been having conversations with people online, of course, so that should count as well.
Lesson 3: Step Out of Your Comfort Zone.
Do something that you would normally avoid because it makes you feel vulnerable or alone, like go to a movie by yourself, eat at a restaurant alone, go to that MTG tournament, or that board game night at your local game store – not to look for mates, but to just get out there and do something!
Lesson 4: Go Meet Folks!
Make an effort to go somewhere new (or to a special event at an old haunt) and meet some new people. Join a club or group that has regular fun meetings. The idea is to expand your friend/acquaintance base. They don’t have to all be potential dates – make friends with people of all genders and types, because this connects you to new networks of people you might not otherwise have access to.
Lesson 5: Ask Someone Out on a Date, Dammit!
Take what you’ve learned from the previous 4 episodes and go ask someone out on a date…then tell us all about how it went 🙂
Well Kelley, since you’re putting yourself out there, I might as well do the same.
Week 1: Positive Traits
First off, I’ve got a knack for getting people to laugh. Whether I’m joking about any of my personal qualms or dysfunctions, rushing someone shirtless with a foam sword at a cookout, throwing off my bosses at a meeting by answering their stupid questions with utter honesty, or whispering something utterly absurd into a female friend’s ear at the most out of place time, I’m pretty good about lightening up a situation. Sometimes I can even do it sober. 🙂
Two, I’ve been told I’m a “strong” guy, in various ways, by various people. That tickles my little caveman ego to no end. Physically, I might weight almost 300 lbs, but I can practically leg press the back of a Fiat, carry up to two drunk people at a time over my shoulders, and ruck a 50+# pack for miles and miles. Mentally, when my co-workers are stressing out and coming apart at the seams, I knuckle down and pick up the slack. Emotionally, I’ve kept stable though things that cracked or broke a few friends.
Of course, that also tends to make me the guy people call when they need a favor. And if I can help someone, then I do, especially with friends and family. So I’m about as reliable as gravity. Loyal too.
Now, being a big, slightly aggressive guy with a driving need to watch out for the people I care about, I’m a pretty protective sumbitch. Putting it lightly.
Add to that I’m pretty cool-headed and resourceful, I throw myself into new things with gusto, and I’m a pretty intelligent guy by many accounts. Most of them are my burn accounts, but hey, they all agree with me. As I hear I clean up pretty damn well too.
Shit, something’s not right here. Why am I not having to fight the women off?
Great Job, Matt! You need to put yourself in more situations where the women can find you. Then you’ll have to fight them off 😀
I maintain a healthy skepticism of that. 😛
Week 2 : Talk to 3 Strangers
Number 1, after hearing about the bikers assaulting the guy in NY, I started small-talk with a guy standing nearby. Odd how a guy at least 35 years old kinda sounded like I did at 22. A little to aggressive, a little to wannabe macho. Cut bait there pretty fast.
Number 2, stated a conversation when noticed a pretty female co-worker pulling some tattoo balm out of her purse (same brand a good friend used). Ended up having a decently lengthy conversation with her about ink in general and various tat balms. That reminds me, I’m due for some ink.
And to top it off I shot the breeze with a secretary from another department about movies and the like. Started with a movie trailer playing on the lobby TV (Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs 2).
Plus I found out a guy on a forum I frequent is also a Tar Heel resident. So that’s cool.
HA! Just listened to Episode 3. Was already putting together a few things before I even heard the assignment.
Organized an Oktoberfest cookout for a bunch of the “extended” social circle (ie friends and friend’s friends) and am working on organizing an airsoft skirmishing group some of the guys were tossing around a while back. Even made myself ask someone else to cover my shift for that cookout, and I always feel SUPER weird asking anyone else for help.
Also, been making it a point of saying “Yes” to more people when they invite me to go do stuff, and it’s made for some fun adventures, even when things go awry.
Got a few other things in the works, but even co-workers are noticing I’ve been a lot more outgoing and “go get ’em”. And since more often than not I’m the guy who just wants to veg out with a cold beer and a book after work, it’s notable improvement.
Saying, “Yes,” to more things is always a great way to make sure you’re having enough adventures. I’m so glad you’re taking the time to go on this journey with us!
Okay, I had this screen up to do this when it was posted but couldn’t think of anything to post. But with the extra time I have thought about this more.
Lesson 1: I started thinking about how I spend my time. I have a lot of interests such as reading, movies, playing drums, languages, theme parks etc, and I have a couple things I am passionate about such as music. I noticed how I organize and make lists for things I do, want to do, see and read. I also workout/run everyday with my cousin. I just trained for and completed a timed run. Just from the few things I mentioned I learned that I am an organized, driven person when it comes to things I dedicate my time to. I also set out to accomplish challenges I set for myself. I do have enough interests that take up a lot of my time, but do like to get out there and have fun with friends.
Lesson 2: I had an opportunity to talk to this guy at a local drug store when he commented on one of my tattoos, and instead I did the typical me thing and looked down, said a quick thank you, and walked away as quickly as possible. So I really can’t count that one. When I thought back to this lesson I started making an effort no matter how much I get nervous talking to people I don’t know. One was this last weekend, I went up to a employee at a running store and started talking to her about GPS watches. Might not seem like a big deal, but looking at how fit she was and athletic and asking her about something she obviously has been doing a lot longer than I have, was a little scary. And I actually learned a lot from her.
Yay! Dani’s playing with us! You and I need to compare our reading lists sometime (Find me on Goodreads!) and good job with your lessons so far. Don’t feel bad about the whole tattoo/shoes debaucle – I do stuff like that, too. Keep up the great work!
We are friends on goodreads 🙂 I am there under my full name Danielle Murray. I will go look under your read list. Currently I am reading Kafka on the Shore 🙂
Well, this obviously means I need to spend more time on GR ;D
Yes you do! I am actually a goodreads librarian so I can add books, etc. Had to since I read a lot of stuff that isn’t popular obviously because there weren’t pages up for them 🙂
Kafka On The Shore! I liked that book. Hope you did, too.
Yes I did! I had read his book After Dark before Kafka. Now I am about to read Norwegian Wood. I am enjoying his books 🙂
Whoo! Haven’t even heard episode 30 and I was already doing the homework! 😀
Hitting BanzaiCon in Columbia SC this weekend. Brand spanking new con for me, and it ended up being vastly underplanned, as I didn’t think I would get the time off until last Friday. No new costumes, but what the hell. I have my DragonCon stuff, a bottle of sake, and friends with TWO room reservations.
Gonna be a blast. 😀
Have a great time! We will need a full report of all the fun goings-on that you have 🙂
Well, now that I’ve caught up on sleep I can piece together bits of the weekend.
Made fewer approaches than I would have liked. Some, but less than I hoped to. However, since I went to the real effort to make myself look pretty good . . . wait . . . make that really damn good, I got approached. Repeatedly. Two sterling examples include ONE chick with a great sense of humor and amazing tits (who came and found again me later in the day), and an unreasonably hot little drunk blonde who I would have NEVER had the nerve to make move on.
Shit like that has NEVER happened to me. In the history of absolutely fucking ever.
Unfortunately no making out or hook-ups. Couldn’t reliably ditch certain members of the socially awkward friend circle. I need to get them someone else to latch on to. But regardless, I still had an awesome time.
Now to make it to Renn Faire in two weeks. Daddy likes wimmenz in corsets . . . errr . . . I mean jousting.
After I finish Episode 30 I’ll shoot you an e-mail Kelley. Great season so far.
This is awesome, Matt! I’m glad you’re getting out there and being more confident about it. See, it works 🙂
Never said it didn’t. 😀
Just been outta the game for a while and it’s weird getting back into some of these habits.
Nice! If you get the chance to check out The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle, that’s a very cool, very strange book.
Will do!